The Right Thing Is Always The Right Thing
Every so often I’m stopped in the street by a fundraiser asking if I’d consider making a monthly donation to the charity they represent. It’s no doubt a situation most of us are familiar with. Sometimes you’re genuinely in too much of a rush to stop, however we’re often prone to avoiding fundraisers or suddenly finding great interest in our phone screens.
Whenever I do get stopped the routine is fairly predictable at this point. I listen to the introduction and, assuming it’s not a charity I already support, I’ll usually tell them I’m happy to sign up.
When they thank me towards the end of the exchange, I tend to respond with:
‘If I know I can afford it, I don’t really feel like I have much of an excuse not to help.’
It’s also not uncommon that I give to homeless people when they ask if I’ve got any spare change. My girlfriend has asked me in the past: ‘How do you know they won’t just spend it on alcohol?’
The honest answer is I don’t.
They may well spend it on alcohol but they may also use it for food or somewhere to get shelter for the night. That decision sits with them. All I can do is act within my control, which is to give in that moment if I think it might help.
Fortunately, I’ve never had to experience homelessness, but I can only imagine how difficult it must be trying to maintain any semblance of positivity whilst living on the streets. Who am I to judge how someone chooses to deal with that reality? Simply ignoring another human being whose situation I know nothing about doesn’t sit particularly well with me though.
When asked why I tend to give when the opportunity arises, I generally summarise it in fairly simple terms. In most situations you typically have three choices available to you:
You can do the positive thing and try to help in some small way.
You can do nothing at all and remain neutral.
You can choose the negative option and respond with indifference, frustration, or comments that make the situation worse.
We all generally have a good sense of the morally right thing to do in most situations, so I typically default to option one.
It’s not a case of seeking praise or recognition. Instead, it’s about doing the right thing as a habit, with the hope that some positive ripple effects may come from it. Our acts of kindness, whether large or small, can often carry more weight than we may realise or appreciate at the time.
The reality is that most of us regularly encounter small moments to make a difference and in many instances it’s the small gestures that go further than you think.
I’ve shared a review of Make Your Bed by Admiral William McRaven before and at the end there’s a transcript of his 2014 University of Texas commencement speech. Whilst it’s an excellent speech with many takeaways there are a few lines during his opening that put into perspective the result of small actions across people’s lives:
“Tonight, there are almost 8,000 students graduating from UT. So that great paragon of analytical rigour Ask.com says that the average American will meet 10,000 people in their lifetime. 10,000 people, that’s a lot of folks. But if every one of you changes the lives of just 10 people, and each one of those people changes the lives of another 10 people, and another 10, then in five generations, 125 years, the class of 2014 will have changed the lives of 800 million people. 800 million people.”
Is every action you take with positive intent going to be received that way? Unlikely. Sometimes you’ll aim for a positive outcome that doesn’t arise, but in general, I’ve found erring towards positive, kind actions pays off over time.
I don’t think it’s necessary to track every good or bad decision we make, but I also don’t think we need to overcomplicate matters. If our lives were recorded in a rough ledger of actions, I’d prefer that when all is said and done there’s more accumulated in the column of positive actions than negative ones.
Most of the time doing the right thing doesn’t require grand gestures or significant sacrifice. Often, it’s just a small decision made in a passing moment.
After all, the right thing is always the right thing.